Sock feet on carpet

I'll never be this way again.

What is it I am really craving? besides fruit and vegetables and all of that regular crap that society craves whenever they are stressed. I guess chocolate and junkfood should be added to that list.

I fucking crave a conversation. Not a conversation based on sex, or drugs, or drinking, or parties or any of those superficial things. An actual goddamn conversation, between two people.

About everything and nothing at all. Confessing their desires and fears to one another and being completely honest. Not holding emotions, feelings or words back; just lay everything on the table and be completely honest. Someone who will listen, understand, not think everything is stupid. Not be afraid to answer the tough questions about subjects noone really knows the answers to. Someone who could read books and write things, paint and draw and think according to whatever mood their in. Someone who listens to music that isn't based on pop culture.

I crave someone who cares enough to notice that i am clearly not okay with all of this and everything going on, that my mind has turned to the worst and I just want to get away and curl into a ball. That I am avoiding the tasks I should be doing in life because I am too fucking scared to let anyone in to see the things I am thinking.

Tired of this.

Please, can we just sit down have a good conversation and not notice the time run by, not run to our cell phones in an awkward moment. Not have an awkward moment and just have comfortable silences instead.

Am I wishing too much?